Dear Future Intern

Dear Future Intern,

If you’re like me, you won’t know what to expect from your upcoming internship at VIDYA in Gurgaon, India. Don’t make the same mistake I did and google “Women’s safety in Gurgaon”, without reading this essay, in which I repeat in different ways that I felt safe, amidst the worrying questions of parents, partners, and friends. When I got hired I had to navigate lots of contradictory advice from many well-meaning people, and now that my time here is almost over I’m ready to share my own advice, however contradictory and vague it may be.

You’re probably wondering what you’ll be doing here. From Monday to Friday you’ll work under strong female leaders (you know, the ones who don’t always get mentioned in the western narrative of India and the East) who have dedicated their lives to children’s education and women’s empowerment. On Saturday and Sunday you’ll travel or go sightseeing in Delhi. If you’re a woman you will be aware of this aspect of your identity when you travel. If you’re white you will similarly be aware of your whiteness. I thought being aware of these parts of my identity would make me feel unsafe but they did not. I have just as much privilege in India as I do in Canada. Exercise similar amounts of caution regarding personal safety as you would at home. Exercise more caution than you normally would to avoid engaging in the colonial or objectifying discourses that may come natural to you.

While the only difference between your morning routine here and at home will be the chai, the rest of your day will often feel a little more exhilarating. The subway will be crammed so close you can simultaneously read the romance e-book of the woman next to you while participating in discussions of marriage rituals with your co-workers. Once you arrive at the VIDYA School Gurgaon there will be assemblies where young girls from surrounding slum communities perform Indian classical dance beautifully, and you’ll notice that while the school has a 50:50 boy to girl enrolment, women are vastly outnumbered in other public spaces you’ve been in thus far. You’ll remember this on a Sunday night when men start spilling into the women’s section of the metro, and at first you feel bad because their section, which constitutes the majority of the train, is extremely crowded compared to the women’s section. When a woman yells at a man for being in the wrong section you at first feel sympathy for him, until you remember there is a fundamental problem with the fact that there are hundreds of men taking this individual subway and less than 30 women. You’ll wonder where the women in this city of 17 million are. A woman next to you, around 45 years old and wearing a trendy jacket, jeans, and rocking a short haircut turns to a sari-adorned woman of about 70 and says, “if we don’t demand respect for ourselves then why should we expect them to give it to us”. After the younger woman leaves you’ll realize they’re not mother and daughter, just two women staking claim to the space they take up.

At work you’ll help with everything you can. You’ll write newsletters, take pictures, make databases, and write emails and along the way you’ll learn about the day-to-day tasks of running a national NGO that has helped over 300,000 people. Your work won’t always be glamorous but if you’re looking for glamour just wear an Indian suit and some fancy shoes. While you may not work with children, you’ll hear more “good morning ma’am’s” from cheeky kids poking out of classrooms than you ever expected to, and will be inspired by the sheer volume of success stories coming out of VIDYA schools and community centres.

On the weekends you’ll visit some of the most amazing sites you’ve ever seen. If you’re like me, you’ll fantasize about having your wedding at the Amber Fort, justify buying pashminas for everyone you’ve ever been friends with (my scarf count is currently at 20), and take endless photos in an attempt to capture the energy of a culture (spoiler alert: you can’t). You’ll read amazing books, like Salman Rushdie’s Midnight’s Children, under a single light on the train ride home while your partner sleeps above you, and you’ll try food so spicy you cry, but so good you can’t stop eating it.

The best piece of advice I can give you is to have confidence in yourself and to have confidence in India. At the end of the trip, you will know so much more about NGO management, India, and yourself.

I am so excited for you.

Adrienne Fanjoy

Queen’s Project on International Development (QPID) India Intern 2016

p.s.

Watch out for the monkeys!